Feeling Helpless

This past weekend was definitely an emotional adventure for me.  Eric went to South Florida again this past Friday night.  My dad was working.  My mom said she had been sick.  My mother-in-law was in downtown St. Pete.  And I wanted to play softball!  A friend had asked me to fill-in so I found a sitter to attend the game so I could take Gavin.  Everything was going alright.  I suck at playing 3rd base.  I suck at hitting.  And now, I figured out that I suck at running!  Here's what happened:

I was up at bat.  0 balls - 2 strikes.  I hit the ball just past the pitcher and into center field.  I ran to first base and made it!  Next up, John Sims.  Not sure where he hit the ball but I took off to second and made it again!  I saw that the ball was loose so I definitely could run to third base.  And that's when it happened.  As I'm about three steps away from third base wanting to round it and run home, my left quad cramped up.  I will say that I made it to third base though!  But I was done for.  I was limping to the stands with a feeling a disappointment and defeat.  I was trying to stretch it out but my leg muscles wanted nothing of it.  I saw my son crying for me and I couldn't hold him.  I saw the team and I know I let them down.  Then I did something that I didn't even do when I was in labor; I cried.  Yes, the paid hurt so much but add the feeling of helplessness and I'm an instant wreck.

After the game, it took a long time to get to the car.  I was using Gavin's stroller as my walker.  Thankfully it was my left leg so I could drive.  I called Eric right away.  Then I called my mother-in-law; she was too far away to help with Gavin.  Then I got a hold of my sister-in-law.  Thankfully she was home and after my hysterically explanation, she offered to meet me at home to help put Gavin to bed.  Heather and Dylan were my heroes!

If you know me well enough, then you'll know that I'm not one to ask for help.  But every now and then (lately often), God breaks me of my pride and shows me that I can't do everything on my own.  He's given us family and friends to assist us when the burden is too heavy.  They're gifts from God!  Like salvation, why wouldn't you want a free gift from God?!  Lord, thank You for the many "gifts" You have blessed me with.  I only pray that I can help others as You have equipped my family and friends to help me.